I watch the sea of black moving towards the seats set by the rectangle of land soon to hold someones loved one.

I’ve never been to a funeral before, but this looks like they all do in the movies. It’s a dreary day, the cool wind brushing against my face, making tears more likely.

And there’s something odd. I haven’t cried, nor do I expect I will. Isn’t that what everyone is supposed to do? Doesn’t everyone cry at funerals? Am I just an exception? Am I just too shocked to process it?

I hand lands on my shoulder and I turn. Ruby gives me a weak smile and we start walking towards the ocean of black together.

Liam is already sitting and he beckons us over. We all sit down.

A man steps up before us and begins to speak. Who knew words could be so empty and meaningless? Loved, strong, beautiful, in the afterlife.

I look over at the couple standing right next to the grave. I watch as the woman falls, the grief simply too much. The man catches her and holds her there on the ground, and together they sob for the child that they’ve lost.

Should I be doing that? Shouldn’t I be crying? Isn’t that what people do? Those thoughts race their way through my mind, chasing one another, mocking me. So many questions, so few answers. So much for a happily ever after.

“And so, even being gone, he will be forever in our hearts.” The man says, bowing his head.

The woman is still crying, her sobs piercing the air like knives. Cold, sharp, and deadly. I’ve never seen pain so raw. Tears so harsh they should leave you bleeding or scarred.

A pair of green eyes catch mine, and August nods. It’s a nod that could carry unspoken words, whispers so hoarse that no one should be able to hear them. His eyes seem to say he’s sorry, but I don’t know why he would be apologizing to me. I guess sorry is all that’s left to say sometimes.

I feel a hand grasp mine, which had previously been hanging limply by my side. I don’t have to turn to know who it is. I’m glad he’s here, I didn’t think I’d have to go to this funeral. The doctors had said he was stable, ‘an unforeseen complication.’ That’s what they had called it.

“And so, with a heavy heart, we must now say goodbye to Marcus Kersey, may he rest in peace.”

I look over at Leo who gives me a weak smile and squeezes my hand. We hadn’t been very close with Marcus, although we did know him. He was the kind of person that you just couldn’t help but smile when he was around, always cracking jokes, it seemed that his goal in life was to make the whole world smile.

So much for a happily ever after. Maybe they don’t exist, after all, he’s leaving behind Mari Weathers, his soul mate. I know it happens, but I’ve never known anyone who had it happen to them.

Now poor Mari will go through the rest of her life without her soul mate. Like Ruby said, true love and soul mates are different things but the idea of her never even knowing it. That in itself was heartbreaking. No, scratch that, heart shattering.

So much for happily ever afters.